I think My Daddy is Darth Vader
by Buggzter
Summary: AU. How a little boy figures out what he THINKS his daddy is. Inspired by my son's love-hate relationship with a talking Darth Vader helmet.


I think my daddy might be Darth Vader.

One day when I was really little, we were having a yard-sale and getting rid of many of our old things - including a couple droids that cared for me as an infant, as well as some other baby stuff. I wasn't a baby anymore. I was almost 2 years old and already a big boy. No more baby stuff for me, no siree! My Daddy had left a couple days before for a business trip - he did that all the time. We didn't know what he did because it was a big secret that no one could know, he said. That afternoon, though, I saw a black pair of metal gloves hanging out of his luggage in the land-speeder. They didn't look like anything else I had ever seen before! I was kinda scared, but I didn't tell anyone.

Months went by without any problems, and I forgot about those dumb gloves. But I found this long, black blanket-type thing that I decided to use to keep the cool wind off me one night. Daddy was really, REALLY mad! He said I shouldn't tough his things without permission. I was sad, I didn't know that the blanket was his, and I told him so! It wasn't a good blanket, anyways. One side was shorter than the other, and it was really thin. It barely kept out the wind at all and really didn't keep me warm. I told Daddy that, too. He sighed instead that time, and told me to ask for things first instead of taking. I told him to get me a better blanket. The next time he came home from a trip he brought me a really thick one with stars and light sabers all over it! IT. WAS. AWESOME.

I didn't really think about those times for a few years. When I was six though, I was mad at Daddy. I didn't want him to keep leaving. He told me some of the funnest stories ever, and I didn't want the droids always watching me and I didn't want Mommy always trying to stop me from having fun. She said it scared her when I did things like climb on the big rock piles or jump off the roof, but Daddy let me. I wanted him to stay. But he said he couldn't stay and he'd be back soon. Soon was always days and days later, not in a few minutes. A few minutes was SOON. Mean Daddy.

I was mad at him for saying "soon" when he meant a LONG TIME, so I snuck into his luggage in the land-speeder one day. There was this super cool black helmet with a voice-box on it, and that black blanket thing, the gloves, some heavy black boots, and a funny thing that looked like a magic shirt with a box on it! I didn't know what to think, but I stayed very quiet. When the speeder stopped, Daddy brought me out to see his spaceship he used. It was so BIG! He told me I was naughty for sneaking into the speeder, but he knew I wanted to see where he went. He let me see the inside of his ship and it was AWESOME! So many buttons and spots where the laser cannons were and screens... While I was there, Daddy got a message from his boss who said to come right away to the Senate. I don't know what a "senate" is, but it sounded important. When Daddy was talking to the old guy (who looked like a dead toad!), he told me to hide and not come out - but I peeked. That guy was gross.

Daddy took me back home right away, but not before leaving his luggage behind. I asked if I could hold onto his blanket since it smelled like him, but Daddy just smiled and said he needed it for work, that it was part of his outfit! I couldn't believe it, Daddy uses a blanket for work - he takes naps too! He said he would get another one of the blankets so I could always have one when he was gone.

When Daddy came back the next week, he brought me a blanket and said I could sleep with it. That night I found a rip in it - but it wasn't a rip exactly. It was a burned slice through the corner - like a light saber does!

I am going to keep an eye on Daddy. Yesterday he and mommy were talking loud when they thought I was asleep, and she said he needed to stop playing like he was the biggest bad guy in the universe, there was someone else to do that all the time and he didn't need to. Daddy told her he had to, or the Emperor would be mad at him. The EMPEROR. My dad knows him! WOW. But that means, if he knows him, and the toad faced guy who wore a hood, and has all that black stuff to wear, and has to face light sabers?

My daddy HAS to be Darth Vader.

I don't know if that's cool or if I should be scared.


End file.
